One day down

Well, no one challenged my theory yesterday, so I must be right. Heh. I thank you for your comments, as always, and am glad I made some sense.

I asked Mr. Shrinking Knitter [who is a shrink] if any of the antidepressants worked in a way that released endorphins. Unfortunately, they don't. The only two endorphin-releasing drugs he could think of were alcohol and marijuana. Definitely not on my menu!

Fortunately the discussion ended before he could point out that I might be looking for an easier, softer way. [You 12-steppers will recognize that line!] I was very aware of it, but didn't want to say it out loud.

Instead, I'll write it down, to remind myself that even though I know what needs to be done, I'm always going to be trying to figure out a different way, one that requires less effort, one that doesn't teach me a thing.

I must always remember to be teachable.

In the year or so before I started following eDiets' Glycemic Index plan, I visited three endocrinologists and my family doctor, looking for a magic bullet. The endos were no help. If your blood-sugar levels are normal, they're not going to give you thyroid medication. I had other thyroid symptoms – dry skin, feeling cold all the time, fatigue, etc. – but lab values rule.

My family doctor – the dear Dr. C, of whom I've written before – was more willing to help me experiment. We tried Armour Thyroid for a while, and another synthetic drug, too. I was finally convinced that this was not the answer when I started experiencing heart palpitations.

He then prescribed Topamax, known among drug salesmen as the 'doctors' wives drug.' One of the side effects of Topamax – for some patients – is weight loss, so lots of samples apparently were making their way home in black bags. It didn't have that effect on me, and my insurance wouldn't pay for it, since my diagnosis code didn't match theirs.

I've also tried Xenical, but couldn't remember to take it and don't remember it being terribly effective. Also expensive, even when my prescription plan paid for half the cost.

My biggest concern with taking drugs for weight loss, though, is that I think I would have to take them forever. I'm not willing to do that. If I had a disease for which I needed daily medication, I would certainly take it. While I realize that obesity is a disease nowadays, I think it falls into a different category for management.

I was diagnosed as hypoglycemic at one time, and the 'prescription' was to eliminate sugar and white flour from my diet. I did it willingly, lost 30 pounds in very little time, my energy levels went up-up-up and my hypoglycemic symptoms went away. After five years, I got complacent, started risking a bit of sugar here and there and thought I was different.

And the truth is, I am different, as we all are. We have to find our own path, surely, and then we have to follow it. What has worked for me in the past will certainly work again. I just have to get back on the path.

Yesterday was a great day. Still not a lot of get-up-and-go, but I managed 30 vigourous minutes on the rowing machine and two sets of 10, 12, 15 or 20 reps of various free weight moves. My arms are so sore this morning I can barely lift a knitting needle. Food was wonderful yesterday, as well.

One day down. No end in sight. I just want to keep stringing good days together until I can't count them anymore.