Go read this, Part II

I realize this blog is called The Shrinking Knitter, and I also realize I talk more about the shrinking – well, the not-shrinking – than I do the knitting. So after I thank you all again, profusely, for your thoughtful comments on my ruminations, I'm going to talk about knitting. And point you to another blog which will bring us back to shrinking.

M@rla and I are twin daughters of different mothers. We've never met, and we may never meet, but no two people could have such similar, non-functioning metabolisms and not be related. And when she said this:

"I eat like the "after" picture. I just don't look like the after picture, and I don't understand why."

I said, "Bingo!" Well, not really, but yes … that's exactly what's going on around here. If I could clone the part of her that loves weight-training and inject it into myself, I'd have the trifecta of achieving a perfect body, wouldn't I? Eat right, cardio and lifting.

Maybe I already have the perfect body. Maybe this is it. What a concept, eh? Back in Rubens' time, M@rla and I would have been nude models, admired throughout the land. Maybe we should spend our energy developing time travel machines.

Then PQ said:

"And hell, if you're gaining/maintaining weight anyway when you eat healthy what do you have to lose by eating a chocolate bar from time to time? Only ever eating completely healthy food is as unbalanced in its own way as only eating processed junk food."

Well, "Bingo, again!" says I. [Not really, again.] Seriously, though, that second sentence is, um, profound. And I also meant to say yesterday that there are more calories in one of those packages of snack-size Snickers' you can get for a buck than there are in a full-sized Snickers bar. So yeah, why not just have a chocolate bar from time to time? You'll save a couple hundred calories. 'Cause I know you can eat a whole package of snack-sized ones.

So finding the balance, as Lori says, is at the root of the issue. At least for today. 'Cause you know it's going to be something else tomorrow.

So the knitting. I've been making Christmas stockings for my son, his wife and their new baby girl. I ran out of cream-colored yarn and am waiting for more before I can continue. I'm using a pattern I designed, an entrelac creation, but I'm changing it a little bit.

Knitters frequently take a pattern and tweak it and add and subtract and presto! They have something unique and all-their-own. How weird is it that I'm taking something all-my-own and tweaking it? Heh. Pictures will come later.

I'm using wool, the non-superwash kind, and using big needles and when the knitting is all done, I will throw them in the washer with a little dish detergent and agitate the hell out of them and shock them with hot and cold water and shrink them on purpose. [That's technically called 'fulling.' But it's really … get ready … more shrinking!]

[Hey! Maybe I could put myself in the old Kenmore, too! Come on over … party in my washing machine!]

The original pattern wasn't written for fulling, so we'll see if this experiment works. If it doesn't, I'll have to cut the stockings up and make Christmas coasters out of them. The kids will be so happy with that gift. Not.

Finally, here's the go read this part. You probably already have. I love Crazy Aunt Purl. Her book just came out and it's funny and sweet and sometimes heartbreaking. [And if you haven't bought it yet, what are you waiting for?] She's doing her book tour, so that 'go-read-this' link will take you to her blog post about the northwest U.S. leg of the trip. But it will also, if you read far enough, take you to a dressing room in a department store [which takes us back to shrinking] and, if you don't sniffle just a little bit, well … you're probably thin to start with. No offense.

The book tour is taking a swing through Nashville later this month and my daughter and I get to go see her! We are trés excited.

You know I'm excited when I start speaking French. Heh.